Anti abandons the internet.

it's finally over, thank fucking god.

Saturday, June 11, 2005

 
anti's guide to frying in highschool.

the first time i ate mushrooms i was in highschool, and i was sorta nervous about it, because my friends told me crazy shit about what i should expect. they said that it was a very visual high, and it wasn't out of the ordinary to be looking at someone's face and watch it melt onto the floor. or for the sky to be green, or maybe even polka dotted.

welp it wasn't as visual as they said it was gonna be, but i DID see some pretty heavy duty trails.

the plan was for weissman, whitey, and i, to roll over to wiatt's house and wait for Dealer McDope to drop off the shrooms. we each planned on eating an 8th a piece. but weissman got a little extra because he was the guy who knew the guy, or whatever.

a bunch of us headed back to whitey's house, because whitey had what we called "the back room" which was a spare room dettatched from the house that was used for storage. but we converted it into our own personal opium den, complete with couches, candles, and coolers full of beer, ect. we knew what was UP in highshchool, eh? maybe we would have been able to convince girls to come over back in those days if it weren't for that pee smell, and the constant lurking of house flies.

when we arrived, we all whipped out our zip-lock baggies full of assorted mushroom caps, and mushroom stems. we compared each other's portions, and marveled over the fact that we were all about to eat something that literally grew on a piece of cow shit. got to love being a lodie! and so we ate our drugs.

within an hour we were laughing hystericly, and bouncing off the walls, and full fledged trippin our balls off. or as we liked to put it, "trippin balls." but then out of nowhere, without even realizing that they had left the room, whitey comes in to tell all of us that weissman had officially lost his mind on drugs. so we all clamored out of the buckhorn to find weiss standing in the middle of the street in front of whitey's house with his arms straight out like jesus, and his mouth wide open like a butterfly net. but before we could get close enough to stare or throw something, whitey shuffled us all back into the opium den, and assured us that he would take care of weissman.

my boss's sale this weekend.

after another hour or two, i went searching for them and found them in whitey's bedroom with weissman passed out on the floor in the fetal position, and whitey pacing his room and drawing on the walls. i asked what happened...

whitey said, "well weiss man was on my bed when i saw his pants get all wet, and that's when i knew he peed my bed...
but he seemed kinda freaked out about it...
so to make sure he knew i wasn't pissed off, i flipped over the mattress and poured my beer all over it."

sometimes whitey borders on super-genius, but i guess not when he's shroomin. although it made perfeect sense at the time.

eventually whitey's mom (sorry for all the mischief, bev) finally had heard enough, or was awoken out of her coma, or whatever the deal was, and came downstairs, and found us acting all weird and suspicious. Bev is a nurse, and it wasn't a big secret to her that we were doped up out of our minds.

she held out a cup, and jokingly asked whitey for a urine sample. but the really funny part was that whitey whipped it out, and GAVE her a sample on the spot.

i think around 6 or 7am i road my skateboard back home, and snuck into my bedroom, and went to go trip out and hide under my covers. alone.

later we got the news that weissman hadn't lost his mind after all. at least not permanently... whitey's mattress was completely ruined, although he still slept on it for another three years.






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