Anti abandons the internet.

it's easy to look at the world around you, the millions of people...

shit! the fucking UNIVERSE, and how infinitely unimportant, astronomically microscopic, your pith existence is.

it's hard not to feel like an ant who has just been lucky to not have been stepped on when you see things like that.

but it is my opinion that this is a defeatist way of thinking. because it's not WRONG per se... it's more true than anything.... but it's focusing on bad energy, and justifies a low self worth more than anything.

have you ever had a bad day, where everything just keeps going wrong. and no matter what... all day long you're just miserable, and the shit keeps on piling and piling...

and just when you need a straw to breath, they pile on ten more feet of bullshit to make staying sane 100% unfathomable.

but what's appauling to me is how unnecessary that is. if you do some introspective thinking, and reflect back on things, you'll notice that you had a shitty morning with a few bad luck type things AND THEN you hit a point when YOU were the monkey wrench in your OWN program, and everything from that point on was only difficult because of you and your bad attitude.

there's two people late for an appointment stuck in gridlock traffic on the freeway. one person is freaking out, honking, biting their nails, and sweating bullets. the other person has their seat leaned back as far as it will go, and is comfortable rocking out to a bad ass play list he made on his ipod...

which person do you want to be?!?!?!

what you have to realize also is how circular all of what i talk about is. everything connects and is relative to eachother. and it comes down to my definition of success as a human being existing here on earth.

to me, the easiest way to explain it is that when i go to sleep, i know it was a good day if im happy. and im happy so often it should be a crime. thank god it's not.

posted by John  # 1:58 AM