Anti abandons the internet.

it's finally over, thank fucking god.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

 
super models* come up to me all the time, and they say, "hey buddy, why you look so sloppy? eh?"

and i tell them, i dont look sloppy at all, and they're elitist for thinking so. and what they call sloppy, perhaps others call comfortable.

but let's take things down to brass tacks, shall we? there's a fine line between not giving a fuck, and being a big stinking bag of insecurity.

let's just say i started off not caring but now im ten miles past being insecure. i think i send off a message that i dont think well enough of myself to even take care of how i look.

i've sorta let my sloppy styles become part of my existence, and my only excuse being, "hey sucka, i gotta be me..." but is that really justification?

can't a crackhead argue the same point (i gotta be me) maybe you just gotta PROBLEM, and you shouldn't make yourself a martyr for a cause that has no importance.

im sick of my cousin's "starving artist" jokes, and only because he's right.

it's not like i have to shave everyday, or wear a designer suit, or throw away my skateboarding shoes. but maybe i could show up to work showered, my teeth brushed, and my hair cut nicely and tucked cleanly under my ball cap.

maybe i could go through my closet and eliminate every t shirt that was bought prior to the year 2000.

big tanky and i recently saw this sad sack of a boy slink from his parked car to the store he was headed to. i commented to her how you could totally feel his insecurity as he dragged his feet and kept his eyes on the ground... with clothes that didnt fit right, and hair and a hat hiding his face. and i wondered how often i come across the same way.

tomorrow i get my hair cut, and today i did my laundry. i have a fresh tube of toothpaste, and im bout to jump in the shower.

johnny's cleanin up his act, folks. mark it on your calendars, it's a day to remember.

*idea of imaginary supermodels talking to me stolen from tony pierce.






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