Anti abandons the internet.

it's finally over, thank fucking god.

Sunday, October 24, 2004

i feel like im procrastinating on growing up.

becoming an adult is harder than it looks when yer a kid in school unaware of life's bumpy assed rollercoaster of a road.

im like where do i start. i mean, do i really need an Ikea tv commercial saying "hey grow up, numbskull. it's time..." ???

maybe i have my own timeline, maybe it's never "time to grow up". perhaps im grown enough... i mean, i pay my own bills, pay my own everything, so who's to judge me for how i live my life?

i like to piss my money away on dope and worthless handheld electronics like ipods and digital cameras and im lazy on my days off, and so what?

who am i being compared to? because stand alone, im doin great. so what if there's ppl from my graduating class in highschool, making a shit ton more money than me... they're fucking unbearable pricks.

you'd pay me to not have to hang with these snobs, and i wouldnt trade anything to be one of them.

wanna know what sucks about me? im selfish. im not very mature. i have poor hygene. im disrespectful. AND inconsiderate.

im no shining star. and how annoying is it when you read a blog that's basically a personal ad, all the "here's my best foot being put forward" crap, the "i live in my tiny bubble, and am unaware of the world around me" bit.

sometimes it boils down to spite, and sheer bitterness on my part. i always hated the alleged chosen ones. those types you've seen all your life even in highschool, where they did nothing, and everyone let them and loved them for it. made me jealous as hell.

but i know better now.

now i know that failure, and struggle are what build character, and broaden a person's personality.

there's something liberating about failure... because you find out it's not so scary afterall. shit, you didnt die did you?

you let the goosebumps that accompany any good old failure possess you, until you feel them on your face and cheeks. and learn, MAN.

older people are smarter than younger people, and only for one reason. experience.

you can't learn karate from a book, and one year of ACTUALLY DOING IT, is worth ten years of reading how to.

in the end i'll never grow up, out of spite. because fuck all yall. i gotta be me. if i had a peso for every time someone gave me a "helpful tip" of how to improve myself as a person, id be a billionaire, and i had a hard time not taking it as an insult, like they're saying that im not perfect the way i am.

get me?

so fuck that, and fuck them, because they're close... i DO look fat in these jeans, but it's WRONG because it's PHat. har.

with a p to the h suckatash.

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Tony Pierce