Anti abandons the internet.

i think im ready to crawl out of my cave, and face the world, and suck up my weird big ball of depression, before i choke on it.

i think it gets to be confusing to me, and i feel betrayal from the world... that's why a blog would prolly be a bad idea in those times.

no im sure of it.

but something about this thing, this blog, i derno... i wish i knew enough to just put my best foot forward sometimes.

i mean ok, i freaked the fuck out, and now that's it's over, i'm not even sure why, cuz it's really sorta childish of me...

the bottom line is that i'm over it. whatever it was, i'm not even sure.

one thing that i wrote that makes sense to me, in hindsight, is: something about turning off your brain is good.

yah. ain't it though?

it's only tuesday night, and it feels like weeks have passed, and tomorrow after i wake up, i'm gonna actaully take a shower, get dressed, and go fucking do something. like maybe i'll see spiderman 2 finally, or i derno... just take a drive...

my favoritest friend bigT came over to slap the depression out of me, and she really helped me out bigtime. cuz all it really took was her and i talking about how lame posers are, and how this one time Jennifer Pocock popped her with an upper-cut that landed tanky in a bathtub. but before you feel too bad for bigT... know that she hit first. heh.

i'm sorry to the people who were scared and/or worried about me enough to write me emails. thanks for the "feel better" wishes. i do.

i think i'm just gonna not party like that for a long time OR ever again.

ever again.

never forget kids. the higher you go, ther harder you FALL.

so i've eaten finally, i ordered a pizza and it happened to be two-for-tuesday, so i hooked up bigT with her own to take home since it came free, and now i'm here... and i'm ready to just be me again, not saddy saddersens, cuz i hate that guy.