Anti abandons the internet.

it's finally over, thank fucking god.

Friday, February 27, 2004

 
my mom sent me a rad email. i was literally rofl. yes it's true.

To:anti
From: Mom
Sent: Monday, February 02, 2004 12:43 PM
Subject: Vocabularianism
>
>
> For those who appreciate the intricacies of the English language...the
> Washington Post publishes a yearly contest in which readers are
> asked to supply alternate meanings for various words. The following
> were some of this year's winning entries:
>
> 1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.
>
> 2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
>
> 3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
>
> 4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
>
> 5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
>
> 6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly
> answer the door in your nightie.
>
> 7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
>
> 8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavored mouthwash.
>
> 9. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after
> you are runover by a steamroller.
>
> 10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
>
> 11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
>
> 12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a
> proctologist immediately before he examines you.
>
> 13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish
> expressions.
>
> 14. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
>
> 15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul
> goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.
>
> 16. Pokemon (n), A Jamaican proctologist





<< Home

Archives

December 2002   January 2003   February 2003   March 2003   April 2003   May 2003   June 2003   July 2003   August 2003   September 2003   October 2003   November 2003   December 2003   January 2004   February 2004   March 2004   April 2004   May 2004   June 2004   July 2004   August 2004   September 2004   October 2004   November 2004   December 2004   January 2005   February 2005   March 2005   April 2005   May 2005   June 2005   July 2005   August 2005   September 2005   October 2005   January 2006   July 2007  

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?

LINKS:

Tony Pierce