Anti abandons the internet.

i have fears and reservations, like normal people do. but i never let them get the best of me.

i figure keeping the faith and diving in and and ...
and basically pulling it off,
to me thats still a quality and not a detrement.

it feels so good too when it works. and it works far more often than it fails. even when it doesn't work out, it's still not failure. only talking myself out of it is.

and i understand how it feels. how the "what if's" can dominate your thinking, and make you justify backing out. i would never tell someone they're wrong for thinking that. or that it's dumb. maybe those folks just can't get passed it, and they know their limits. and seriously, i repect that. it's not me, but i can dig it.

but where does one draw the line? the what if's never will stop if you don't have boundaries. cuz the way i see it, it's really risk assesment/management. and again, i think that is important... lemme illistrate my point with absurdity:
how can you leave the house, cuz what if a bird poops on you?
how can you take a shit, because what if a cottonmouth water moccasin slithers up and bites your ass?
how can you have a friend, what if they stab you in the back?
how can you fall in love, what if they break your heart?

i mean i understand saying "how can i murder someone, what if i get caught?" but mostly people are just sweating the small stuff, and missing out on wonderful things because they're affraid of this and that, when we're supposed to only fear FEAR itself.

i'll admit i could use a good dose of the "what if's". some friends started calling me dicey, cuz i just take chances all over the place and roll the dice with almost every decision. i kinda push myself in the water, and see if i float, and when i don't... either figure out a way to help myself, or beg everyone who's answering their phone to save me. but fuckit really, because i like it this way. i like having the only regrets being that i need to be less risky. i'm a firm believer in "nothing ventured, nothing gained." and i know that is the attitude that is gonna make me a success in the future, and actually... that makes me a success TODAY. even if i'm a poor starving pathetic success at that.

so i'm assigning homework for all you readers. TAKE A CHANCE. with anything.
steal a candy bar, approach that "10" at the bar, quit that job you hate and try for a better one, confront a friend, stand up to a bully, chase your dreams, give all of yourself despite the fact there is a chance you might not be recieved...

just do it. even if the chance you take is as small as buying a lotto ticket. just do it.

posted by John  # 3:52 AM